Here's one for ya (two, actually)!

First thing: On Halloween evening, I went to a party. Let me preface the day: Weeks of late nights, meetings, stock piling cans of soda, and such had built up to the school Fall Carnival that was held on Halloween day from 10 am until 2 pm. The night before, the committee (I was co-chair with my friend Emily) was at the school until 11 pm - only because they kicked us out - setting up for the big day. Emily and I arrived at the school before 7 am on Saturday to get rolling. The carnival was a huge success. The committee was a bunch of wonderful ladies that it was a privilege to work with and get to know. The carnival ended at 2 pm and with tear-down and clean up and everything, we finally left the school just before 5 pm. I tell you this just to let you know that my day (s) were busy. I hadn't been sitting around eating Halloween candy (although I very much would have liked to have been). I will also throw in here that the week of the carnival, I decided that I didn't have enough to do, so I thought it would be a good idea to sew a cheerleader costume for Maren. (It really turned out awesome - if I do say so myself - but probably I could have picked a less-hectic time to have done it.) Editor's note: That's pretty much where October went and why there were no blog posts.

So, anyway, I went to this Halloween party at my good friends home. It started at 5, but we didn't get there until after 6 because when I got home from the carnival, I had to lay on the floor of my bedroom, and then just plain wasn't able to get up for a good half hour. My body ached, my legs hurt - I could barely walk. It was all like a really, really good workout!

So, I like this friend who hosted the party, and I actually genuinely liked all the guests that were there, so I felt comfortable and at ease (you know how at some parties you feel awkward or out of place - like at Geoff's work parties ((not you, me at his parties))...), so I went ahead and piled up my plate - great meatballs, by the way, Shawna! A bunch of the ladies were sitting at the table chatting while we ate. I sat down with my plate filled and made some comment about how I could load up because I hadn't eaten all day. One of the ladies looked at me and said; "You know, that really is a lot of meatballs." I said: "Oh, shut up, skinny chick!"

We all laughed and I'm pretty sure the 'skinny chick' smiled and laughed as well, but I don't know her well enough to know if she was being funny and sarcastic, or serious about the meatball comment. I went on to say something to the group about '...this is the type of conversation that people have in their heads but usually don't let it out of their mouths...' or something like that. But the thing is; it totally didn't bother me!

Ten years ago, even five years ago, it would have spiralled me into depression (and probably a Sam's club size bag of Halloween candy!) but I didn't care. I am comfortable with myself (totally could stand to lose about 40 lbs). Since last November, I've lost 40 lbs and that is great, but the thing is, I'm still way over weight. The Wii balance board does it's "Ohhh!" surprised-sigh (you know what I'm talking about) when I step on it still, but I work out three to four times a week and am doing the best that I can right now in my life.

I think the bottom line is that I am older. Not that old is an excuse to give up, but age just brings with it a maturity to where you can be okay with who and how you are. I guess, I've come to realize that every body truly is different. I just plain don't have the DNA to ever allow me to be a size 4 (or 6, or probably 10). It was awesome. I felt so good about me.

After the kids and chaperone's left to trick or treat, I laid on my friends couch and ate 'Monster Munch' popcorn (which was the best ever!, Shawna) while I chatted with her and her husband and another couple. That's how good I am with myself, and how much I didn't care about 'Skinny chicks' opinion.

ANYWAY, Second thing: The following Saturday, the girls and I had kind of a girls day, so we went to Denny's for lunch (their choice, not mine). In my mind, I had a conversation where I decided to have a good meal and then maybe I could have the great looking apple crisp with ice cream afterward. I went ahead and ordered a grilled chicken salad with lite dressing on the side. No croutons.

When the waitress brought our food, she set my salad down and said "I guess I went a little crazy with the cheese." I said "Oh, that's okay." She said "You look like you don't mind." It was one of those cartoon moments where everything froze. I was reaching for the ketchup for the girls and kind of stopped mid-air while I processed what she said and was cracking up in my mind thinking: "Did she really just say what I think she said?!" So funny! I chalked that one up to a language barrier. I did, however, NOT have the apple crisp with ice cream. Just to be sure...

So even with that, I am still good with myself. But I think that probably, I should stay home during PMS week so as to avoid any "incidents" while my emotions are closer to the surface.

A couple things: One, I'm proud of my new-found maturity (not in all aspects of life, by the way); and two, I can't believe the nerve of some people to say stupid things.

Life is awesome!

Here's pictures of the cheerleader costume, though. I'm simple, but pretty proud of myself.